Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Barbeque

Next day I tried to dress appropriately. I knew Dr. Ilham wouldn't mind. He never cared about how he would dress himself. But I heard his wife was from upper class. Her dad was a well known writer, a good journalist and a cabinet member all at the same time and I didn't know what were her likes and dislikes. Just wanted to play it safe. I arrived sharp 3 o'clock at their 2 stories Federal Way house. Was kind of mid class neighborhood but was a beautiful house with vaulted ceiling, skylight etc. A nice backyard with apple, pears and cherry tree. A dog the called Reilly. I asked about the kids. Nazifa said they were either at school or college. They had two daughters and one son. The oldest was their daughter who was studying journalism just like grandpa.
Kids are grown up now you know? they have their own activities. We can hardly get them to agree to go camping with us anymore. Dr Ilham said.
Will, thats good I said. You can't force kids to do what you think is fun for them, they know what they are doing I replied.

Barbecue was great. They way Nazifa prepared ground beef before Ilham was putting it in gas grill, she must have followed a secret recipe. Because I have never tasted anything like it I should admit. I didn't even touched the chicken. She said she just has to have chicken with beef because kids are conscious healthy eaters.

After we had more than enough food and I decided to go with minted yogurt drink with a blend of cucumber, I asked Nazifa if she is going to accompany as in trip. She said Oh no, first I hate working vacation and Ilham must be very busy finishing his project, second , the most dangerous wild life I can get is bears threat in Washington state's park and in no mood to go looking for snakes and third I have to be here for kids and take care of my mom at the same time.

Dr. Ilham added to her comments, yes Bibi Jan is getting weak and I kind of worry about her these days.

OK than at least now I know who is going , who is not so lets make plans Dr. Ilham.

We talked for over two hours. About anything and everything. How many laptops we need, ended up deciding with two. with some extra storage drives. Extra batteries, car charger, enough of first aid kits, etc etc. WE decided to buy food and dishes there instead of increasing our luggage. I offered we use my travel agent who had experience for South America.

Phone call that I thought I would never make

Its nine thirty Tuesday morning. I have just finished breakfast. Read a few more pages of Charlie Wilson's war. Than I put the book aside. It was a bright day in my apartment in West Seattle by California avenue close to the corner of Admiral Way. I pick up the phone and called Dr. Ilham's house in Federal Way a mid size town 25 miles south of Seattle.

- Hello Dr. Ilham.
- Oh hello Darweesh, what a surprise, I thought you will never call, and I will call you Thursday at the end of our 13 days we talked about. So are you going somewhere or you decided to tell me no today instead of Thursday?
-Hmmmm my dear Dr. Ilham you are a very smart guy, smartest of the people I actually met, but now even you jump to conclusion before the facts. How do you know I will say no to your proposals?
_My Dear Darweesh. You are wrong again. I never say anything without weighing the facts and you know that better than anybody because you were my smartest student.
_ Will than I am lost, where are your facts coming from? I haven't told you my decision yet.

_ Remember Darweesh, Psychiatry and Psychology is not only my subject but also my hobby.
I am not a psychic but I can be a mind reader specially if I am talking to someone about an important issue face to face. So even for any reason or just to be polite, you never told me that this trip is little bit too much for you, but I saw unwillingness in you. I saw that you were thinking how can I take my foot of this hunting loop that I accidentally stepped on. I admire you Darweesh. You are very nice and clean cut conscious person. It doesn't matter if the first day you said no or if you say it today, I will still think of you as a good intelligent valuable friend. Here to make it easy for you. And maybe it is better I think alone anyways.
_ Hahaha, sorry I can't stop laughing Dr Ilham.

_ What is it my friend, I don't think I was funny
_ No Dr. Ilham, sorry. Its just amazing, totally amazing. I feel like I have just discovered second moon for earth or something.
_ Come on my friend, you know that's impossible, so tell me what really amazing happened that you are that happy?

_ You are wrong for the first time in your life and I am the witness. I thought I would never see that day. I admit your psycho analysis of me was right. From the day you told me about your big plan until last night I was looking to find the best way to decline. First I was hoping you forget you even offered me, and you don't take it serious. But than after your call and your email I realized that's impossible. So I was thinking of a way to say no without being rude. So I guess your psycho analysis is amazing as ever and never be wrong. But ..
_ But what my dear friend, why you went quiet? Are you still with me? Go ahead I won't interrupt you.
_ Yes Dr Ilham, I was laughing and being happy for the fact that even you are mortal human being and don't know all the answer, I thought I will never see this. You always been right. The fact of the matter is, I called to tell you after all I decided to accept your offer.
_ Good point my friend, that is a big lesson. I am not God, and no human ever going to be right in every situation. I knew that and I am sure you knew that too. It is just hard to believe why you thought I am always right?
_ Because you were, every single time, no matter how hard I looked and debated and searched to find something that makes better sense than what you told us and thought us but always got disappointed by not finding any. But now I know even you don't know everything and can be wrong.
_ Isn't that what I thought you anyways? There is no God which is born as human being. There is no perfect King, president, astronomer, psychologist, pope, etc etc. Even almost all of the prophets made a mistake or three? Some we know and some we don't.
_ Yes, knowing the fact is something , but finding someone mistake that always been right is such a pleasure ,, (laughing again).
_ Well, glad to entertain you my friend. Feel sorry for myself because I never had such a pleasure because first I never thought of anyone as perfect and second, I always think about their weak spots before think about positive things they have done.
_ OK what about me, what are my weak points Dr. Ilham?
_ Oh, some I have told you in classes which I am sure have changed by now. Haven't seen you much lately so I can't judge. And I am sure we will be pointing to each others weaknesses in that travel. I will really appreciate you point mines instead. We are not Student and professor anymore. You know more than me maybe and we are going to be working as colleagues and equals. We will have plenty to talk about and enough time.
_ OK than when I can see you, where?
_ Tomorrow, anytime it is convenient for you. And I hope its not too much bother if you come here.
_ OK than Tomorrow at 3.00 pm in Federal Way.
_ Agreed my dear friend. Looking forward to it. I will get some ground beef and chicken. And oh yes Foster, as I remember your favorite beer. So is my wife's. Me, as you know, I rarely drink, maybe some red wine.
_ Thank you Dr. Ilham, don't go to any trouble please.
_It is not trouble, Nazifa is going to kill me if I have a guest and he doesn't eat anything in our house. Women are some powerful entities you know?

A decision that had to be made.

I was reading a book called Charlie Wilson's war. Kind of like Tom Clancy;s writing but much more deep in politics. Was one of those books you hardly get into it but it the same time once you started you want to finish. I just finished The Kite Runner last week. Which was fiction, now I wanted to read something real about the subject. And I found Charlie Wilson's War just the answer. Although I thought was boring, because pure politics. But so enormously real, and was revealing so many secrets that you had to read. The way government function in this country. Congress, CIA operation etc. And the fact that law and principals are just made for general public and the people who makes them and the main branches of government doesn't give a damn about it. I didn't know until I read that book that even foreign governments like Pakistan, Egypt, Saudi Arabia etc hire the same lobbyists in Washington that American companies hire. You can be a dictator, your hand bloody with innocent peoples blood and still can hire a powerful lobbyist in Washington DC to represent your cause in congress, get favors from legislative, found your countries and army and get good publication in American media for you all at the same time. There is no American policy anymore that is just for the benefit of this county and its people. Everything is for sale, you just have to know how it works.
So that's why I couldn't put the book down even it was 1 am.
Suddenly I remembered it has been almost two weeks since I talked to Dr. Ilham. First I thought I will get panicked. But there was that strange feeling. Everything was so unreal that nothing seemed mattered anymore. Politics were so dirty, country's establishment didn't have legitimacy to me anymore. And I didn't want to think about it and didn't want to get involved in it. For me politics were all lies before and now I was certain of it. So I wanted to distance myself from it, as much as I could. So what better way to forget all those than going to amazon with Dr. Ilham. Forget about world politics and who really running the world or my country. There it will give me a chance to focus on bigger picture. Universe, creation, religion and its origin. And If I knew Dr. Ilham one thing he hated the most was using a believe, an Idea, a philosophy to legitimize a rule. He was a secular that even the most secular person compared to him was like pope. So I was sure whatever conclusion we draw there, he will never permit anybody to used as tool for politics or ruling over people to get a government seat for someone.
He was my hero in that aspect. I always hated people invoking God's name and go in killing spree, declare war on nations, or establish a tyranny or even under name of democracy use it to amass billions and solidifies his position all at the same time. In that respect he was even more extreme then me opposed to anyone who was using God's name for any purpose other than praying in privacy of his own home or to show himself right from wrong not others.
So the idea of exploring something bigger for the sake of not to rule over others but purely for the sake of truth was suddenly appealing to me
That's when I decided to give him a call next morning.